All relationships begin with a honeymoon phase where you feel as if you’re walking on clouds. You love being together, the sex is great, and you can’t see one another’s faults. As time goes on and hormones fade, reality sets in and you get to see your partner for what and who she really is. This is the point where you either realize you truly love her, find out that you’re not really compatible, or that you simply aren’t happy. But how do you know if you’re actually in a toxic relationship?
1. How Does She Act?
Although she says she loves you, does she act cold toward you, isn’t interested in sex, never appreciates the things you do for her and couldn’t care less about your feelings? If so, you may be in a toxic relationship.
2. There’s Verbal Abuse
If she tends to put you down, rants, yells, and just generally says rude and mean things to you then she obviously doesn’t respect you. She probably doesn’t respect herself either or she wouldn’t be acting like that. Some women go so far as to turn their verbal abuse into physical abuse, though no man wants to admit a woman is pushing him around. If this is your case, then get out of the relationship now.
3. She’s Controlling
You can’t go anywhere or do anything without her looking over your shoulder, nagging, calling, and tracking you down. Nothing you do is right, she’s jealous and possessive, and you’re feeling smothered. It may even get to a point where she’s telling you how to dress and who you can and can’t be friends with.
4. She’s Manipulating
If she doesn’t get what she wants she’ll use tears, threats, the silent treatment, or withhold sex. It’s like trying to cater to a spoiled child who’s never happy or satisfied. This actually has no reflection on you but how she feels about herself. There’s something lacking within her but she refuses to work on it so she takes it out on you instead. You can’t make others happy, you have to make yourself happy.
5. The Dependency Factor
This one can play out in one of two ways. Either she’ll make you completely dependent on her—for money, love, sex, etc.—or she’ll become totally dependent on you and make you feel guilty if you try to leave. If she’s the dependent one then she may scare you or play upon your emotions, making you think that something terrible will happen to her if you break up, she may even threaten suicide.
Being in a toxic relationship will only suck the very life out of you and it will never, ever change, no matter how much you try to work on things. She needs counseling if she’s displaying any of the above actions and behaviors, but that’s not your problem. If you’re smart you’ll get out while you can and find someone who’s more stable and loving. You deserve better!
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- Relationship Breakups – The Most Common Causes
- Tips To Overcome Jealousy Before It Ruins Your Relationship
- How To Jealousy-Proof Your Relationship
- Breaking Up – Should You Stay Or Go?